Finding the right therapist is a process, and it can be exhausting. It is completely normal to only find the right person on your third or fourth try. Having to repeat your story to different people is hard, but do not be afraid to try out a few therapists until you find someone who fits. That trial-and-error process is the reality for most people.
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Here is a simple guide to help you find the right therapist without getting overwhelmed.
1. Identify what you want to work on
Before you start looking, think about why you want therapy right now. Are you dealing with a big life change like a career move, a breakup, or grief? Do you need help managing daily anxiety? Knowing your main focus makes it easier to find someone who specialises in that area.
2. Always make sure they are HPCSA registered
Checking credentials is essential. In South Africa, choose a professional registered with the Health Professions Council of South Africa (HPCSA). This includes Clinical Psychologists, Counselling Psychologists, and Registered Counsellors.
HPCSA registration ensures the practitioner has real, accredited qualifications and follows strict ethical rules to protect you.
3. Understand the main approaches (and what suits you)
Therapists use different methods (called modalities) to help you:
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Somatic & Trauma-Informed Therapy: If you are hyper-aware, tend to overthink, or constantly analyse your own feelings, talk therapy can sometimes feel like you are talking in circles. Somatic therapy focuses on your body and nervous system instead of just your thoughts. It helps you notice physical feelings (like chest tightness or stomach tension) so you can process stress stored in the body and actually feel connected.
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Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): Practical and goal-focused. It helps you spot unhelpful thought patterns and gives you tools to manage anxiety and everyday habits.
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Psychodynamic Therapy: Explores how past experiences and childhood patterns shape your current life and relationships.
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Person-Centred Therapy: Gentle and patient-led. It gives you a safe space to talk without judgment.
4. Prioritise the therapeutic alliance
Finding a therapist you click with makes a huge difference. When you feel comfortable and understood, building trust happens much more naturally, making it easier to open up and get the most out of your sessions.
In your first few sessions, ask yourself:
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Do I feel safe and heard?
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Are they non-judgmental?
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Do I feel comfortable speaking openly?
If it does not feel right after two or three sessions, it is completely okay to stop and try someone else. A good therapist will understand and will not take it personally.
5. Give it time, but trust your gut
Real progress in therapy rarely happens overnight — meaningful change usually takes a few months of consistent sessions. But there’s a difference between “this is uncomfortable because growth is hard” and “this isn’t working.” Stick with the process long enough to know the difference, and remember that switching therapists isn’t failure — it’s how you find the fit that actually helps. The right therapist is out there; it just takes a bit of patience to find them.
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